Update

Just thought I'd share a quick update. I'm now 5 weeks into my workout program and I'm down 12 pounds! The weight is coming off more quickly and steadily than with The Shred program. However, I think that's actually attributed to my eating habits now. Little to no refined sugar. Why little to no? I'm not about to go all sugar nazi on anyone and refuse to eat food that's given to me (with the exception of desserts). I told my husband the other day this is the best "diet" I've ever been on. We can go out to eat and I can have what I want and I'm still losing weight. It's those darn desserts that were getting me. And, the best part, I don't even miss those sweets. I'm addicted to my fruits now. And so is the mister! Today's lunch features kiwi and peach slices and raspberries. Oh my yummy!

Need some inspiration on kicking the sugar habit?

Have a GREAT Wednesday everyone.

It's a New Dawn, A New Day

That, that right there. It IS a new day. I've come out of my hole. I have to. I have a presentation to give tomorrow and work to finish today.

Despite all the heartache and frustrations I've still been working out. Actually I worked out sans partner for over a week.

It was weigh-in Wednesday today. I've now lost 10 pounds. It's been just over a month...like a month and two days. Awesome. Twenty more to go. I can do this.

It Makes My...

heart hurt.

We've been TTC since June of 2008.

We've had one pregnancy and one subsequent miscarriage.

I've had a very painful (my opinion and experience) hsg.

The mister had his semen analyzed.

Guess what?

We're normal. Everything is "normal". Oh, except for the fact we can't seem to get pregnant.

I was told today by the nurse relaying messages from my OBGYN, that my next step is to go see a fertility specialist--that we can't afford and that my insurance doesn't cover. But that they, "Have a free seminar every so often."

Yes, thanks, a free SEMINAR will definitely help.

When asked about the option of possibly clomid or something along those lines, "No, that's not a possibility. You'll have to see the specialist."

I'm almost 33, we've been ttc for 3 years and now I need to start from square one and hope a seminar will do the trick. How can there be no other options? Because I've gotten pregnant once it's assumed I always ovulate? How do they know?

Awesome, except it's not and my heart hurts today and I feel like I want to crawl in a hole and never come out.

Unplanned Visit to the ER

Today started out like any day. Up at 5:30 to workout with E. Home by 6:45 to make the mister his coffee and pack his lunch. Breakfast for me-two scrambled eggs covered in El Yucateco, a slice of Food For Life 7 Sprouted Grains bread with roasted pecan almond nut butter, and a cup of coffee. Then shower, to school to retrieve two files from my work computer-for my Masters' portfolio that was due at 4:30 today-, to the Teacher's Store, and finally to Office Max where I needed to buy sheet protectors for that same Masters' work.

And that's where it started. I figured I had looked at the light outside too directly. You know how you get those spots on your eyes after looking at the sun or something bright? It was kind of like that...well...except it was on both eyes. And it was in motion.

I paid for my items and made my way to my car--blinking repeatedly. Am I just being silly? Is this just a sun spot?

I drove towards the direction to go home when I realized this spottiness in my eyes was getting worse-more all-encompassing. I flipped through a parking lot and headed to the mister's work (which happened to be about a mile away, thank goodness).

These were not just sun spots. These were clear-ish. Like puddles on my eyes. Dancing puddles. Dancing puddles that refracted around the edges of this shape, on both eyes, open and shut.

And it seemed as if they were growing. I couldn't see clearly. Signs were blurred, cars were blurred. I shouldn't have been driving.

When I got inside the building the mister was working on I didn't really know what to say. "Something's not right." That's the first thing that came out. As I explained to him what was going on, in between my tears, he tore off his tool belt and told the two guys he was working with that he had to go.

We made it to the Emergency Room a little after 11. After explaining to the admissions nurse what was happening I was taken for a blood pressure check by a very snotty 'nurse' or whatever. She made me feel even worse for being there. I was in the ER, I wasn't having an emergency, just a very scary situation for me. I had to explain the story again and after each question I seemed to exhaust her with my answers. And by this time, the spot was gone from my right eye and only in the corner of my left eye. Great. I'm wasting precious time for other people.

Thank goodness for the first nurse in my room, Jen. She was as sweet as could be, concerned, and funny--that helped. I explained what happened for a third time, with the caveat, "I know this is going to sound crazy," but she assured me it wasn't and said she had seen what I saw--it had happened to her before.

The PA came in next with her laptop full of questions, to which I explained the story a fourth time. She checked my ears, throat, and eyes. She dilated each eye separately, made me squeeze her fingers, and made me follow her finger around with my eyes and then my finger.

She gave me the same diagnosis as Nurse Jen.

Next came the doctor. She did all the same grab-the-fingers-dilate-the-eyes things that the PA did. She even shared that I have really good eyes, great nerves. Thankfully she'd heard the story and around 3:00 basically said it was most likely an "Ocular Migraine" (which I found out later is actually called an Ophthalmic Migraine).

But I had no headache. I had no pain whatsoever.

An ocular migraine doesn't work like a regular migraine. I did some reading up on them tonight and found one very helpful site.

Basically, "Ophthalmic (eye) migraines are quite common and often painless, although the solo term "migraine" usually brings to mind a severe type of headache.But with eye-related migraines, visual disturbances with or without headache pain also can accompany migraine processes thought to be related to changes in blood flow in the brain."

And this is how the author Marilyn Haddrill described it, "People with ocular migraines can have a variety of visual symptoms. Typically you will see a small, enlarging blind spot (scotoma) in your central vision with bright, flickering lights (scintillations) or a shimmering zig-zag line (metamorphopsia) inside the blind spot. The blind spot usually enlarges and may move across your field of vision. This entire migraine phenomenon may end in only a few minutes, but usually lasts as long as about 20-30 minutes."

Exactly.

I thought about what might have caused this...ahem, Aunt Flo (hormone changes)...but it could have easily been triggered by the fact I sat at the computer for at least 10 hours yesterday working on my portfolio.

I'm so thankful it was harmless. I feel very lucky to be healthy. It was very scary to lose my vision. My head swirled with what could happen if this was something permanent. I feel lucky and blessed. I'm glad to be home.

Did I Mention...

That I've now lost seven pounds.

In two weeks.

That rocks.

I've seen two more cranes.

One more possibly today-but I couldn't tell for sure, so I'm not counting it.

My running buddy is on vacation but I got up anyway and ran by myself.

Dear 'ol Aunt Flo arrived today and this was the first time I haven't cried about it in months, years.

Seven pounds. That means 23 more to go.

Impulse Buying

This typically isn't a problem for me. After working in retail and learning about product placement and the like, I'm usually able to walk right past all those little goodies.

Today was not that kind of day.

I started out wanting to replace this:

It may look ripe, but don't let it fool you!

On Sunday I did my usual grocery shopping and on the list was avocado. However, all the avocados in the bin were nowhere near ripe so I purchased one anyway and pushed turkey tacos to Wednesday.

On Tuesday afternoon that darn avocado hadn't even budged. Still green and rock hard. I shoved it in a brown paper bag in the hopes it would help it along.

Wednesday morning I opened that bag excited to find a ripe avocado. Not.

I headed to the farm market store only to find a bin of very green avocados. I decided I'd try the original store I bought the un-ripening avocado from--nope. Then off to another store in town (across the street). I finally found this:

So what am I talking about, impulse buying...I went for one ripe avocado and came home with this:

17 Days In

We've now weighed in three times. FIrst week was the initial weigh in. Last week I was bummed when E lost 5 pounds and I only lost about 2 1/2. Don't get me wrong, I know that it's "healthy" to lose one pound a week and that losing 2 1/2 pounds is great! So I kept my chin up knowing I'm doing great things for my body, such as:

Lots of fiber
No refined sugar
No eating 2 hours before bed time
Lots of water
And generally making smart decisions

This week...I'm now down 7 pounds overall! So 4 1/2 this week. Woo Woo!

I also like to think of it this way--only 23 pounds until my goal!

If I follow the pound per week guideline from here on out, that's only 5 1/2 months until the goal. If I lose two per week, that's about three months. I think I'm getting ahead of myself. But I'm keeping it up!